that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize