I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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