You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
