Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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