I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
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