Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
