Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
