Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize