i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
