you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Randomize
