Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
These tits shall not be calmed
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize