Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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