Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
