Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
