Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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