You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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