I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize