The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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