Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
The air was thick with penises
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
