this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
