i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Randomize
