she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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