He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
North Korea, Best Korea!
there's paper in my vomit.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Randomize
