did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
You ate ashes out of my bong
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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