she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
