piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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