i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Come see our sink grown plant.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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