i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
If I had your ass I would rule the world
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
