I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
