4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize