Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
