You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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