Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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