he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Randomize
