The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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