I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
