I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
