theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Randomize
