wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Oh god it's open bar.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
