yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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