I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
