I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
