unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
