Christians are straight up FREAKS
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I pour the whiskey from now on
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize
