The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Randomize
