he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
