I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize