I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
