I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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