Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
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