I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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