I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Randomize
